daydreaming when i should be studying

 I have multiple recurring daydreams.

The first takes place in the morning- just when its really light outside.. it involves wood floors, clean white socks, and one bright striped pair, my hair all a mess, coffee brewing and the song You Send Me. He's wearing boxer briefs and I'm swimming in his oversized Hanes t-shirt, a relic from his college days that's about one wash away from complete disintegration. He has the white socks on, and im wearing the stripped fluffy ones.

He sings along and we dance--slipping and sliding, unleashing the inner eight-year-olds who know how to turn any wood floor into a veritable slip-and-slide wonderland.

The second is this.

I want to find him on the doorstep. Unexpected. I want to turn the corner after a long day, a long month, a long year and find him smiling with that goofy grin on his face and bouquet of flowers in hand. He'll be sitting there. And when he sees me, he'll stand. He had been waiting all day just to say hello. I'll climb the steps and we will hug. a long wonderful hug where you know you are loved fully- for everything you are. a great perfect bear hug. and all my anxiety will just release and ill forget the day, week, month, year in those moments of bliss.  I'll put the key in the door and pause. I'll feel his breath on my neck as he leans in to kiss me on the cheek. And his silence will fill me, satiate me. I'll push the door open and he'll follow in step. 

That's what I want. To see the man I dream of sitting on my front stoop. Waiting. Smiling. Unexpected.

The third one is this..

I want to go on a walk. hand in hand. you know the ones with the fingers laced. on a fall day. blue sky. slight breeze. you can feel the suns warmth on your face Its perfect outside. I'll be wearing a cashmere sweater and jeans and my favorite cowboy boots. You will be wearing your favorite h jacket, jeans, and a baseball hat.  A walk that is your relaxation for the day- you can walk in silence...just smiling because you are in each others presence.  Taking in what it feels like to love and be loved- thankful for all the blessings that God has given us. Aware of how amazing our lives are.

So my dearest, darling-est, dreamiest future husband whoever you are
know this...

don't take me to a play. no need to take me to the beach. don't make it a carriage ride through central park or a weekend getaway to paris. make an ordinary day wonderful. i'm not even sure i need you to get on one knee. but do it on the door step.  on the front stoop. or perhaps on a park bench. sitting next to me. on the same level. turn to me and ask me to be your best friend, your lover, your equal. so that then we can go inside and begin our life together, as we've always known we should.

(That being said, you sure as hell better ask my dad first. I believe in chivalry. And I was raised in the South.)